Tim Baca/HIGHLANDER
Tim Baca/HIGHLANDER

The Barn was filled with rows of plastic chairs and the sounds of funk music on Wednesday night as the crowds filled in for “Comedy Apocalypse XII.” Hosted by KUCR and emceed by UCR’s own Juan “Action” Flores, the night promised laughter for the Barn’s last event this quarter. The usual mishmash of amps and instruments seen on stage during Barn events was replaced by three microphones and a leather stool, transforming our restaurant and concert venue into a New York comedy club. As the seats filled up and the crowd fiddled with their cell phones, we waited for the comedy to begin.

At 8:43 p.m., the music faded, the lights dimmed and a bombastic voice from the back of the room announced the arrival of our emcee, Flores. The crowd craned their necks as a stagehand dragged him, facedown on a furniture dolly, onto the stage, positioning his prone from in front of the center microphone. He lackadaisically welcomed the crowd to the event, and told an intentionally cringe-worthy joke about a rooster, a patriot and a prostitute to the audience. From the back of the room a large figure stood up in the audience, decked in a backward baseball cap and UCR sweater. The two began a brief vignette and began exchanging insults back and forth, the apathetic Flores sullenly defending himself against his attacker, who acted and dressed as a caricature of the stereotypical meathead frat boy. After warning Flores to watch himself after the show, the frat boy disappeared as the audience chortled with laughter. Flores sleepily announced the first performer, Ramin Nazer, before he was dragged from the stage.

Ramin began his act with a rambling monologue in pseudo-French and Spanish, his face alight with mad energy. From what I understood, he promised comedy, laughter and espoused his enjoyment of pornography. His comedy was a mixture of deadpan and risque humor, with a small amount of props thrown in. Occasionally, he would break off in the middle of a joke, mimicking an accent or moving around the stage before resuming. While some of his weirder, more avant-garde bits didn’t hit with the audience, some of the people laughed at the raw absurdity of his performance. Ending his act, he jokingly announced that his show “The Three Bears” would air on Fox, before dancing around the stage as an ironically bad theme song played from his cell phone.

The next vignette featuring Flores saw him returning to the stage, this time on his feet, where he performed a surprisingly good dance performance to the song “Macarena.” The frat boy made his second appearance, and the two began a dance-off to the song. The two traded off and moved in sync as the song played faster and faster over the PA. Eventually the two stopped, out of breath, and agreed to settle their differences. The joke could have been fleshed out a little better, as the two seemed to resolve their differences oddly quickly, and the dance-off ended with more of a whimper than a bang. However, their performance added a bit of physical comedy to a night mostly devoted to stand-up.

The next comedian, Baron Vaughn, came to the stage with a flourish. He was dressed in a jogging suit and flat cap, resembling a grown-up, nerdier version of Steve Urkel. He poked fun at his own appearance, saying that he looked like the principal of “Break Dance High School.” His comedy was much more focused than Nazer’s, and his bits about sex, race and adulthood drew peals of laughter from the audience. As his set drew to a close, Vaughn also showcased his beatboxing skills, pointing out that it’s his key to the art of seduction.

The penultimate performance featured Flores lamenting his circumcision, where he was joined on stage by his two “parents.” They promised a reunion with his long-lost foreskin, which turned out to be a bagged lemon wedge. Some of the audience groaned, some snickered and others facepalmed. Flores beaming, welcomed Matt Braunger to the stage.

Braunger, who has been featured on Marc Maron’s podcast and numerous times on Comedy Central, showed off his stand-up skill. He had the audience in stitches from his first line, and never missed a beat for the entirety of his set, which was a mix of observational comedy, dark humor and the right amount of pandering, as he told the crowd to stay in college for “as long as you can.” His centerpiece bit was about “angels” — not literal angels, but angels that bring laughter to people at the worst of times, from a fat tuba player to a Filipino grandmother wearing an offensive T-shirt. His jokes hit amazingly well, and the person seated in front of me was laughing so hard he continually scooted backward in his chair until he was practically in my lap.

One last time, Flores returned, thanking the performers and announcing the end of “Comedy Apocalypse” as the lights turned back on. Those who didn’t see it this time around should definitely go next quarter. The joke’s on you if you miss it.