Archa – Luna Lilith OceaNyx, an Indian Queer Polymath Witch, B.A. Journalism and Mass Communication (Hons.), M.A. Women’s Studies, faces the suppression of her voice as her UCR ID is abruptly suspended. Hence, reach out via genius.gypsy.archa@gmail.com or geniusgypsy.com.
“the pain I’ve felt of non-belongingness,
and multiple forms of discrimination,
how would you ever understand
if you have 5 acres and a mansion?
all i asked was some genuine generosity
why am i dealing with intense inhumanity?
what is this, if not power play?
what is this, if not hegemony?”
From the mystical heartlands of Bengal to the esteemed halls of UC Riverside, my odyssey as Archa – Luna Lilith OceaNyx weaves a tale of dreams, aspirations and the unexpected tribulations hidden within academia’s shadows. As a first-generation international PhD candidate within the Department for the Study of Religion, I alighted at Riverside in the Fall of 2022 at age 24, fueled by a vision to harmonize art, activism and academia. My aspirations stretched beyond the conventional: reimagining Indian religions through a queer prism, probing the depths of feminist religious studies and illuminating the crossroads of menstruation, trans studies and religion. I sought the chance to pursue autoethnography through the lens of an Indian Queer Polymath Witch. Armed with a profound grasp of multiple languages, dialects and the rich tapestry of Indian culture, I am uniquely positioned to spearhead foundational research in Indian Religions using ethnographic approaches. Yet, instead of open horizons beckoning my explorations, I was met with walls of prejudice and narrow corridors of misunderstanding and bias.
“I came to the US with dreams hopes and expectations
heartless academics are ruining my life and career
no scope for research, collaboration or studies
while ideas rain from my brain
25 years full of severe hardships
hard to explain is the pain
of multiple marginalizations
please understand, these aren’t excuses
traumatized to see such a lack of humanity
silenced and shattered due to lack of empathy
time telling the true tale
hypocrisy in humanities”
Now, as a 25-year-old interdisciplinary independent scholar, my diverse interests are supposed to flourish, positioning me as a beacon of diversity and a fresh perspective in the academic realm. But the reality has been far from this ideal. In an institution that champions the ideals of diversity and cultural understanding, I was deeply disheartened to feel intensely marginalized, often left voiceless and misconstrued. It’s disheartening that as a researcher and theorist – one who’s in the process of crafting a book – I’ve confronted numerous barriers and biases, especially from established figures in the Humanities. Regrettably, colonial academic politics seem to be gaining traction, fueled by prejudiced administrators within the Graduate Division. I am confident in my potential to introduce groundbreaking scholarships and theories to the College of Humanities Arts and Social Sciences. Instead of receiving encouragement and recognition, I’m confronted with the heartless academia’s unacceptable colonial politics.
My academic tribulations bore the unmistakable marks of bias. Unwarranted conduct letters devoid of real dialogue, retaliation due to my active participation in the historic UAW strike, baffling grading decisions for Fall 2022 and Winter 2023 courses, rescindment of Dean’s Distinguished Fellowship in Spring 2023, revocation of Fall 2023 registration after registering, wrongful termination of Teaching Assistantship, the constant discouragement of my distinctive interdisciplinary approach, expiration of health insurance and expelling me from the university, although my Spring 2023 GPA is 3.75, have been inexplicably appalling. It’s profoundly unsettling that in a revered institution fostering a plethora of ideas and decolonial methodologies, there exists unfair systemic institutional discrimination and bias.
“they hid their hypocrisy
underneath the hood of acting good
as professors at an esteemed university
they should’ve cared more and understood
instead, harsh treatment triggered with power play
– a mental murder of an international phd student
what else would you call it anyway?”
Beyond the confines of classrooms and lecture halls, my endeavors have been repeatedly stymied by barriers — some covert, others overtly pronounced. Whether rooted in my race, age, sex, color, international background, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, spiritual beliefs, socio-economic challenges, hidden disabilities, or avant-garde methodologies — or perhaps a combination thereof — the crux is evident: these hurdles echo a larger, institutionalized oppression our community must address.
Disturbingly, the places I considered sanctuaries transformed into zones of unease. My previous residence was a hotbed of quiet discrimination from both my roommate and flatmate, making the atmosphere stifling and almost suffocating. For instance, a precious gift of mine was thrown away without consent by my ex-flatmate. From Fall 2022 to Spring 2023, I existed in a cramped 5×7 square feet double occupancy space, devoid of basic furniture, traumatized by the daily presence of veiled racist microaggressions.
As the ground beneath me shakes — with my inactive student status, my Teaching Assistantship position terminated and my civil rights violated multiple times — it’s not just my individual plight that’s illuminated. My narrative underscores broader, pressing concerns, potentially resonating with many international students. It beckons a vital introspection of our systems, our attitudes, and our commitment to genuine inclusivity. I’ve personally felt the sting of isolation and exclusion, underscoring the pressing need for a South Asian Resource Center. Many South Asian students grapple to find a sanctuary or a dedicated resource center that addresses the profound cultural shocks they encounter. For weeks, I yearned to converse in Bangla, my mother tongue, but the absence of Bengali-speaking circles left me wanting. Though my journey at UCR has been fraught with challenges, I am grateful for the unwavering support from CARE, Case Management, CAPS, Ombuds, UAW, LGBTQ Resource Center and numerous UCR folks who recognize the profound injustices imposed by a select few.
Tyler Jang, president of the Queer Graduate Student Association, says, “I have seen Archa struggle and fight with a determination to remain in this school despite the efforts and discrimination directed against her. From mere participation in the graduate student strike, not being in the good graces of her department leadership and attempting to write about her background in India that went against the grain of a class that taught about analyzing power, she has been removed as a student from UCR. All this is just scratching the surface of the issues. I have seen how she has been mistreated by her department and left to fight for herself without the financial, medical, or legal support that she needs as an international student. The faculty have actively refused to explain many of their actions even when asked why they dismissed Archa. Yet in spite of all this, she continues to impress me with her determined effort to show that she has a place here at UCR, even if some faculty don’t agree with that.”
A UCR PhD student who wished to remain anonymous mentioned, “I met Luna during the strike. She is very passionate and dedicated to her research because it relates to her personal history and lived experience. The Religious Studies Department’s efforts to expel her rather than help her learn their methods are all too indicative of our university’s disinterest in equity and education. She should be focusing on developing her research and teaching now, not on how she will make ends meet.”
“I think that Archa has not been given the support or responsiveness that she deserves as an international student. Coming to a new country and trying to learn the rules of a completely different education system is overwhelming for anyone, but my friend had additional obstacles placed in the way of them succeeding. It is an authority figure’s responsibility to explain the rules of assignments to their students and let them know how to improve, but professors in the religious studies department did not do this. Archa was also unjustly given a no contact order and accused of sexual harassment when trying to talk to her professor about her grades. I think that Archa should not be expelled from the university and be given another opportunity to succeed,” another anonymous UCR student expresses their thoughts.
Fellow Highlanders, as I reflect on the distressing events that have left an indelible mark on me, I recognize the strength in our unity. I’m profoundly grateful to The Highlander Newspaper for giving me a voice and allowing me to share the trials I’ve endured since Fall 2022. This pivotal moment beckons us all. Let’s stand united, not just for me, but for every scholar who dreams, dares, and rightfully seeks more. My therapist said, “it’s the department’s and university’s loss if they’re losing you as a PhD student, you are so full of potential.” Similarly, I have been told the same thing by a lot of people. I earnestly hope the University will re-enroll me as a graduate student and reinstate my deserved Fellowship to rectify their ruthless retaliations. This is our collective call to action, urging us to reaffirm our commitment to the core tenets of academia — diversity, innovation, and compassion. Together, let’s ensure a future where every Highlander feels acknowledged, empowered and deeply valued.
