The purpose of this column is to support you. First-Gen Life will offer tips, stories and guidance to help first generation students not just survive, but thrive here at the University of California, Riverside (UCR).
Welcome back Highlanders, it’s week three already! The first few weeks of college always feel like a blur of meeting new people, running around campus and trying to look like you have your life together. However, the hype starts fading around this time. It’s easy to start your daily doomscroll and think to yourself, “wait… am I doing it all wrong?”
Let’s be honest, on social media, everyone looks like they’re having the “perfect” college experience. You see group pictures at the Bell Tower, late-night boba study sessions that somehow make homework look aesthetic and friend groups that formed overnight. But remember, you don’t see what is between those moments, like the walks to class where you feel invisible, the quiet lunches alone or the days when you’re just trying to keep up.
That strain is much more intense for many first-generation students. You may feel the need to demonstrate that you’re doing things “right” and that the effort put in to get here was all worth it. However, the reality is that there is no single correct approach to college. Everyone lives a different version, and the sooner you realize that, the less time you will spend worrying about whether you are living your life correctly.
If your college life consists more of studying alone at the library, FaceTiming your family in between classes or eating leftovers in your car, that doesn’t make you less successful. If anything, it makes you authentic. You need to realize that you are creating something from the ground up and it will take time. Don’t be afraid to move at your own pace.
Sending the first email to a professor,discovering a club where you feel seen or ending a demanding week, are not displayed on social media. Though the small victories aren’t shared online, those are the times that truly demonstrate growth.
If your experience differs from what you see online, that’s authenticity, not failure. First-generation strength is in the chaotic center, which is hidden by everyone’s highlight reel.
Remind yourself that you are simply creating your own narrative and are not falling behind. Believe me, it’s worth more than any post could ever convey.
