You sit down in your lecture hall at the beginning of the quarter. You don’t want to be there, no one really does – that is until you see them. You see the most jaw dropping human you’ve ever seen, and it’s all downhill from there. You now work a full time job: having a crush. You start planning your outfits to look good before class, and making sure their seat is in line of sight with yours at 3 p.m. on a random Wednesday. Then the quarter ends and you’re just left wondering what could’ve been. So, to avoid all that, if you’ve got a crush, here’s what you’ve gotta do.
Talk to them
A conversation never hurts anybody, unless you lose your voice, then maybe save it for tomorrow. If you’re feeling bold, you can go with an introduction and short question to get a conversation going. Something along the lines of: “Hey, you’re in my _______ class right? I’m _______,” would be a friendly but subtle approach just to get to know their name.
If you’re not so fond of the subtle approach you could always directly go for a nice compliment while asking for their Instagram or phone number. However, if you decide to be direct, make sure to be respectful with compliments to avoid making your crush feel uncomfortable. The words you choose could be the difference between success and failure when talking to them. Just start with an enthusiastic “hello” and work from there.
Your crush is a real person, not a fantasy. Get to know the real them.
It’s easy to get attached to a fake idea of what a person could be, rather than getting attached to who they really are. It’s like a celebrity crush, but with a completely attainable and all too real person who sits right in front of you in class instead. Once you’ve talked to them, get to know them and some of the things that they like, then, use those to connect with them.
Maybe you both like the same sport. That opens the door for a simple, “Did you catch the game last night?” This approach not only allows you to learn real and true things about the person you once admired from afar, but also bridges the gap between the two of you, allowing you to bond and create a real connection. Who knows, maybe you’ll joke someday about having ridiculously athletic Division I babies.
Be yourself, be open-minded, be okay with the possibility of rejection and most importantly don’t be afraid of your feelings.
While flirting is fun, be aware of your actions and try to figure out if your crush is in the same place as you. Be attentive to their body language. Make sure they are not uncomfortable, and not already in a relationship. If that’s the case then don’t force things. Pat yourself on the back for trying and for putting yourself out there. Don’t let this discourage you. Being respectful of people’s boundaries and feelings is imperative to being a good partner and all around good person. While flirting is fun, make sure you aren’t blindsided by your feelings and try to be sure of where they’re at before going any further.
There are so many people out there you will be able to find your person, but it isn’t going to stem from a forced and uncomfortable connection. At the end of the day, rejection is a part of the process of finding “the one.” We’re all naturally inclined to like and love, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Worst case? You end up with a funny story one day. Best case? You find our soulmate. Good luck crushing it Highlanders! Y’all got this.
