When you fall in love with someone, it can be hard to describe the mysterious, magical or even irrational feelings you have. While love has inspired poetry, music and mythology for centuries, psychology and neuroscience explain that these intense feelings we associate with romance are deeply rooted in the brain’s chemistry. From the butterflies in your stomach to the sense of comfort you get around that special someone, love is a symphony of chemicals orchestrated by neurotransmitters and hormones to create the feelings that we know as love.
According to Harvard Medical School, one of the most influential neurotransmitters involved in love is dopamine, which is responsible for pleasure, motivation and reward. When falling in love with someone, dopamine levels increase, sparking feelings of excitement, attraction and intense focus for the other person. Time feels faster, and everything is more vivid. This can explain why puppy love can feel all consuming and euphoric because your brain is lighting up like fireworks, encouraging you to seek closeness with the person that started the rush. Your brain essentially treats romantic attraction as a reward, and every smile, text and glance reinforces the spell.
Additionally, the stress hormone cortisol plays a major role in love, whose job is to heighten your awareness. The sweaty palms, a racing heart and nervousness someone might get when thinking about a crush can be attributed to the alertness and arousal cortisol creates. When you are falling in love, you might worry about how a relationship will work out or wondering if they like you back. The chemical sharpens your memory, which can explain why you might remember small details about a crush, such as the sound of their laugh, their hobbies and other small details which seem seared into your brain.
Another hormone at play in the love concoction is serotonin, the hormone responsible for mood regulation and focus. Interestingly, serotonin is reduced during the initial stages of love, which can explain why love can feel all consuming, filling one’s thoughts day and night.
As romantic relationships deepen, other chemicals enter the arena. Also known as the “love hormone,” oxytocin increases with physical touch, cuddling, kissing and sexual intimacy. Oxytocin promotes feelings of trust, and it plays a major role in long term bonding and sustaining long term relationships. Likewise, the hormone vasopressin is produced, increasing loyalty and contributing to monogamous relationships.
In the end, love is a fascinating blend of science and wonder, where neuroscience supports what we feel as magical and unexplainable. Understanding how neurotransmitters and hormones like serotonin, dopamine and oxytocin work together can deepen our appreciation of the beauty of love. Love’s biochemistry gives rise to connection, attachment and meaning in life and knowing that the warm fuzzy feeling we get is rooted into our biology shows us that love is not something we should take for granted.
