Have you ever felt like something’s off when everyone gets in relationships, but you? Let me tell you: it’s not bad. While the hopeless romantic in us does wish for a certain someone to change our lives for the better, there’s some good that can come out of it. Choosing to be single in a culture where everyone is constantly scrambling for a partner gives us more time to do things we’ve never done before. New movie you want to see? Buy the ticket. Fancy a dinner with yourself? Treat yourself.
The point is that there is nothing wrong with choosing to be single in this day and age. I’ve been single for a couple years now; it really is an opportunity to make the world your oyster. I can go on and on, spewing the classic sayings of ‘love yourself first before you can love another,’ but it goes a lot deeper than that. It’s an opportunity to get to know yourself more, and what you desire for yourself. What are some of the qualities you truly look for in a partner? Are you emotionally mature enough to handle the hard situations that come with a relationship? A relationship is a 50/50 even split where both sides have to put in the same amount of effort in order to try and best help your partner. I do realize there are certain circumstances that can’t be resolved easily, but it’s all a gradual work in progress that requires effort from both parties. Most relationships begin to crumble because they lack a strong foundation set by effort or the gradual lack thereof. Once you become comfortable with your partner, effort starts to decrease and soon, issues start to arise. It’s important to communicate your problems clearly to prevent further conflict.
Communicating what you want and need should extend outside romantic relationships. A lot of the building blocks that form a relationship are simple people skills that are applicable to the real world. While there may be no official rulebook when it comes to dating and relationships, I will say this: don’t leap before you look. We, as a society, constantly think that we have to abide by the social norms that others have set for us. So, in a state of panic, we leap into a relationship without even being prepared for the toll it’ll take. Staying single to help develop these skills would also help to minimize the endless cycle of hurt that’s become prevalent amongst our peers. They say ‘hurt people hurt people,’ and they are right. Just because one person hurt you, doesn’t make it right to emotionally hurt the next person who wants to try and establish a connection with you.
