In February, I am starved for love. I wait for “Good morning” texts and desperate “I love yous.” I re-watched “When Harry Met Sally” and “Before Sunrise,” analyzing their interactions and tenuous eye contact. I stare at the couple in front of me in Coffee Bean, fingers interlocked, hushed conversation and delicate smiles exchanged between the two. Though I roll my eyes in annoyance at the face of their love, I can’t help wondering when it will be my turn.
Being a single college student in February can be a difficult time, especially if everyone around you seems to magically find themselves in a relationship just before Valentine’s Day. It was easy for me to loathe this treacherous celebration of love in all my single glory. Heart decorations irritated me, candy grams annoyed me and public displays of affection had me on Google Maps, searching ‘rage rooms near me.’
While Valentine’s Day is not as enthusiastic in celebratory spirit as Christmas, it is impossible to ignore all the expensive gift-wrapped chocolates and ugly teddy bears saying “Be Mine.” It’s easy to label Valentine’s Day as a scam: a day where your wallet determines the love you get. Valentine’s Day spending in the United States keeps breaking a record yearly. In 2019, Americans spent up to $20.7 billion on gifts, including candy, flowers, jewelry, greeting cards and date nights for their significant others. Spending increased to $27.4 billion the next year in 2020.
Two years ago on Valentine’s Day, I had three fun-sized Snickers bars, which I washed down with a large Taco Bell Baja Blast before staying up until 2 a.m., studying for my political science midterm the next day. I remember going to sleep that night, desperate, sad and alone, scrolling through Instagram stories of my old high school classmates pressing red-lipped kisses to their lover’s cheek. I was convinced my destiny didn’t include love. It’s easy to hate a holiday of love when you don’t feel loved.
Although Valentine’s Day has a less than appealing, convoluted origins story with the Romans sacrificing animals in celebration at the Feast of Lupercalia, today, the celebration is extended beyond just being in love to simply appreciate love in all its forms as well.
Last year, for Valentine’s Day, I decided to engage in a well-known tradition: Galentine’s Day. Galentine’s Day is a term coined by Leslie Knope, played by Amy Poehler, on the sitcom “Parks and Recreation.” According to Knope, this made-up celebration falls on Feb. 13 and is the perfect opportunity for ladies to celebrate. My Galentine’s Day included five close friends cozied up on the tiny couch in my even tinier apartment. We watched “Another Cinderella Story” and attempted to recreate Selena Gomez and Drew Seeley’s two-sided mirror dance. We ended the night at 11 p.m., and I had fallen asleep, my heart filled with love from the ones who know me best. Even if it wasn’t romantic, it was more than enough.
Whether single or in a relationship, you can get caught up in negative feelings, sad thoughts and unachievable expectations regarding Valentine’s Day. There is so much pressure put on finding your soulmate, especially around the holidays, to avoid loneliness; I mean, there’s a whole sub-genre of romance movies dedicated to this idea. However, it’s important to remember that Valentine’s Day is like any other day. Two people’s romantic celebration of love and my lack, therefore, is not a sign that you are unlovable. One day, I will experience the love of my dreams — one that makes my heart sing. And so will everyone else.
Although I’m stuck with another unwanted midterm this Valentine’s Day, I will find some way to celebrate the love in my life, even if that is just through a text to a close friend. So, if you are feeling lonely this Valentine’s Day, remember that you can always celebrate the love you have for yourself, your family and your friends. And if that doesn’t work out, there’s always next year.
