Living with roommates can be a perplexing maze for someone who hasn’t encountered it before. To say I experienced a shock during that first week of living together is an understatement. Below, I’ve compiled a list of tips so you won’t struggle as I did.
Communication
Something I didn’t realize before moving into the dorms was the loss of my independence. I have lived in a house with others before, sure. But a bedroom?! Never. It is imperative to have respect for your roommate and establish ground rules that each person agrees to. I’ve found it useful to understand my roommate’s boundaries regarding noise at night, study habits and whether or not people are allowed to come into our dorm. Communication is key, for without it, there may be outbursts of unexpressed frustration in the future. Bottling up your emotions is never the answer.
Scheduling
Another aspect of roommate life I didn’t prepare for was the difference in our schedules. Learning to plan your day around another person’s schedule can be frustrating at times. For example, a majority of my classes are in the morning, so I study during the afternoon. However, my roommate mostly has midday classes and studies late into the night. Initially, this was a conflict because while I was trying to sleep, she was studying with the bright light on! Expressing my concern, the solution we found was shared Google calendars. By doing this, my roommate and I had access to each other’s schedules and planned accordingly to go to the library or a friend’s dorm to study at night instead of disturbing each other’s sleep schedules.
Cleanliness
Something that I took for granted when living with my parents was having a kitchen and a designated area to eat. Moving into the dorms, freshmen are squished into small shoebox-sized rooms and forced to eat breakfast in bed. Upon first thought, it sounds delightful. But as the days went on, I would accidentally spill yogurt or drop my spoon in my blanket. Inevitably, messes were prevalent amongst our room. Noting this, me and my roommate drew our formal rules for who would clean what. We both agreed and taped the list on the wall: while I was assigned to take out the trash and vacuum the floor, she would clean the fridge and wipe the microwave down. This allowed us to form a team-effort instead of each girl cleaning her own side of the room. Even though we each have our own sides, the room is shared. Therefore, if a bug problem were to occur then both of our sides would be infested! Following these rules daily helps me and my roommate stay out of trouble with the creepy-crawlies.
Compromise
My final tip is in regards to diffusing conflict. Sometimes, roommates may have differing values, which can result in disagreements at times. Especially paired with the stressors of classes, homesickness and fatigue, hurtful words may be thrown at one another. I have utilized the art of compromising when dealing with a difference of opinions. For example, me and my roommate didn’t originally agree on whether we should have friends over or not. Both of us were firm in where we stood on the topic. Stepping away from my position, I offered a solution that I hoped we would both agree to: friends could only visit the dorm during daytime hours. Fortunately, she agreed. Not only is this problem-solving technique useful in daily verbal conflict but also can be a helpful practice for compromising in both classroom and work environments.
Living with another person may seem intimidating at first, but by being able to communicate feelings, share daily schedules, keep clean and compromise, you will triumph. I have experienced some obstacles living with other people, but by following these tips, I was able to live happily and issue-free with my roommate.
